Blamestorming

“Blamestorming”

Just as criticism must be bridled by adhering to certain guidelines, so should blame, another form of destructive comments.

Wars often exist within companies between divisions and departments; manufacturing blames engineering for designing a product that cannot be built, sales blames marketing for not doing a good job at getting the word out, and every department blames human resources for one thing or another. More layers of blame can exist within each team or department and between individual employees .

The tendency to blame others is an unfortunate reality of human nature, and organizations sometimes promote this culture through their policies and management styles. For example, a company that rewards performance without also recognizing ethical business practices may develop a “ succeed at all cost” culture, leading to fierce competition and “blamestorming.” A culture of blame is also a large part of America’s litigious society; we sue McDonald’s for our obesity and their hot coffee and tobacco companies for our addictions. Technology’s increasing role in our lives has created more options for blame—in addition to the old standby of malfunctioning alarm clocks, we have computers that lose our documents or fail to send our e- mails .

Somehow, blaming something or someone for what is ultimately our own responsibility makes us feel better. It is usually the easier route, and when everything is someone else’s fault, we do not have to face reality. Some people live their whole lives operating like this, never understanding that by not being accountable for their own actions, they are only cheating themselves .

Realize that people who make a habit of “blamestorming” can appear uncooperative, lacking in accountability, selfindulgent, deceitful—and certainly less than credible. More important, “blamestorming” keeps one from taking action and making positive changes for oneself and one’s future. Understand that the comfort that comes with finding an side “cause” for your problems in no way helps you actually solve the problems. More often than not, if something is not going well in our life, if we want something to change or never happen again, we are the only one who can make the difference.

To get control of “blamestorming,” follow these guidelines:

1. Know when to blame and when not to. Was the situation really out of your control? Is there value in your placing blame elsewhere?

2. Blame in private and praise in public. Have a legitimate cause for blaming someone else. You are still responsible for handling it well. Do not embarrass the person in order to make yourself look better. Speak with him or her behind closed doors. If appropriate, agree on terms that will prohibit the problem from coming up again.

3. Manage misplaced blame. Do not let others get away with incorrectly placing blame. You do not have to be on a crusade, but make it known when you might disagree with someone else’s misplaced blame.

4. Remember that the first casualty of blame is confidence. A leader who misplaces blame or harshly blames his or her followers can affect their self-confidence and inhibit performance improvement. And people who make a habit of blaming others negatively affect their own self-confidence because they are missing opportunities to overcome obstacles and make positive changes.