Section 10: Build Bridges Rather Than Burning Them

Overview

Leticia was devastated when she was laid off––it threw her entire life into disarray. She had only a few days to hand off her work to another person on the team. Unlike others in similar situations, she decided to make the best of these few days. She organized all her information, met with quite a few people who might be most affected by her departure to address their concerns, and made it easy for her replacement to get up to speed as quickly as possible.

When the company was able to hire a couple of years later, everybody on the team immediately brought up Leticia’s name. She clearly cared for their success, and was familiar with the group’s tools and processes. So they called her and offered her a raise in order to get her back from the competition.

When Leticia left the other job, she was just as careful to prepare her replacements to be successful. Although they felt the loss of a good employee, they were able to quickly compensate and adjust.

Most people notice that over the course of many years, they tend to run into the same people over and over again. It is because they are in the same community, same company, common line of work, or have other overlapping interests. When you move to a different city and work for a different company yet continue these contacts over the course of decades, it can feel strange.

But, this phenomenon is an important asset to your career. During your lifetime, you will contact thousands, perhaps tens of thousands of people. If they have a good impression of you, it can open doors for future opportunity. If they are left with a bad experience, doors might close that you are unaware of. Leticia learned it is important not to damage relationships unnecessarily.

Being fired is a most unpleasant, life-altering experience. But if the manager treats you with respect and honesty, you may not harbor a lifetime grudge.

You might have heated disagreements with a co-worker. But if you are open to looking at their point of view and making the best decision to meet shared goals, it is much less likely they will avoid you in the future or disparage you in front of others. In fact, it might just form a bond of common respect.

Your company might hate a competitor, fighting to the death for market share. But if you treat their employees as humans worthy of respect, you may be able to forge a bond five years from now when the corporations merge and you now have to rely on one another for help. Or you might find you are able to hire the best and brightest from the other company because they like the way you treat people.

This phenomenon is entirely unpredictable, and it can bring excitement and joy to your life. Or you fear every change because of the possibility you will have to work with some of the enemies you created over the years. It is your choice.

Always be nice to people on the way up, because you’ll meet the same people on the way down.

—Wilson Mizner, screenwriter