Buyer s Regret and Other Trust Breakers

Buyer’s Regret and Other Trust Breakers

Some people feel that a person who attempts to change a deal at the closing, after it’s been negotiated, is untrustworthy. Since trust is the basis of negotiations, according to that line of thinking, there is no room to deal with them again in the future.

My view on that depends on the situation. It is true that some people are just playing games and looking for whatever advantage they can have. But in most instances, last minute snafus like that arise because the negotiators haven’t covered all of the bases during the negotiation. Terms must be as specific as possible, or there simply isn’t a deal.

What about buyer’s (or seller’s) regret?

Last-minute hesitation is a natural emotion, and you see it most often in things like house sales, where the object being sold is more than just an object. When ten years of your life have been put into a place, the issue isn’t so much the price, but simply the fact that you’re leaving those memories behind. On the other side of the transaction, a first-time buyer who’s never enjoyed the pleasures of a heavy mortgage and outrageous property taxes is bound to start feeling nervous even if she’s calculated her payments a million times.

Establishing trust early on in the negotiations allows the person on the other side to ask directly about these regrets or fears and to address them sympathetically, without coming off as a phony. The words may differ according to the negotiation and your style, but the message you’re trying to send is simply this: “I understand your emotions, and they’re natural. I’m nervous too.”

It’s hard to be on the receiving side of a last-minute switch. The key is to step back and see the terms in their overall context. Was $100 that much compared to the overall contract? Probably not.

Unfortunately, stepping back from the situation at the closing can be extremely difficult, because that’s precisely when your emotions are involved.