Step 3: Uncover the Real Issues: Listen to Thoughts and Feelings

Overview

Not knowing when the dawn will come, I open every door.

—Emily Dickinson

One of the biggest pitfalls in solving tough issues is failing to identify the real issue. You can't solve a problem, especially a tough one, unless you know what the real issue is.

My experience with groups from start-ups to Fortune 500 companies to community organizations shows that groups misidentify the key issue more than 50 percent of the time. That doesn't mean that whatever they have before them isn't an issue, but it's not the issue that's preventing their agreement and successful results.

Focusing on the wrong issue will never solve the problem. What's worse, it frustrates participants and diminishes their willingness to work together. How many times have you "solved" a problem people presented to you and discovered that they weren't satisfied with your perfectly good solution? You addressed the issue they presented, but you didn't address the real issue, the one that was at the root of the problem.

To get to the real issue, you need to practice effective listening, which requires focused attention and patience. Even with highly charged issues and large groups, it doesn't take long to hear out the thoughts and feelings of every participant. When there's no debate and participants aren't arguing or defending their points of view, you can hear from everyone in a brief amount of time.

No matter how urgent the situation or what pressure you may be feeling, it's worth the time and effort to be a reflective listener. It will put you on track with the real issue so that you can uncover effective solutions.