Chapter 19: Negotiation: Creating Win-Win Scenarios

A candle is not diminished by giving another candle light.

—Earl Nightingale,
writer

What Is Negotiation?

Negotiation can be a really simple concept. It is a deal or bargain we make with one or more parties. We're negotiating all the time. It's something we all do frequently in our daily lives without being aware of it.

We usually think of negotiations as involving a major deal, but we negotiate every day. We negotiate about which movie to see or whether to have Chinese food delivered or go out to eat, what restaurant to go to, or where to go on vacation. When I asked my children what negotiating meant, they said, "Talking it over."

We even negotiate with ourselves; we've all had those inner dialogues that go, "If I do this, then I'll do that. If I buy this, I'll do without that..." We give a little, we get a little.

On a broader scale, we're negotiating in all social encounters. When we're getting to know each other, we're negotiating our positions. When we meet someone new we're negotiating our terms of relationship. Will we be friends? Will we be good friends? Will we be more than friends? These are the kinds of unconscious negotiations that go on throughout our lives.

Negotiation depends on communication.

—Art Windell,
writer