Three Basic Communication Skills


Management's ability to communicate the team's charter, up-to-date business information, and any subsequent changes in expectations is crucial for launching and sustaining successful teams . Of course, effective communication is never a one-way phenomenon . Team members, leaders , and organizational staff members associated with the team's efforts must all be proficient in the three basic communication skills:

  • Sharing information

  • Listening effectively

  • Providing feedback

Let's examine each of these in turn .

Sharing Information

How good are you at sharing information? Can you provide facts in a meaningful and useful manner? Can you attract the attention of team members without pushing yourself on them? Do you separate opinion from fact? Do you help information come alive by providing examples and analogies like a good storyteller? Are you better at sharing information to one person at a time or to the whole group ? Can you present information in written form as well as verbally? Can people tell what you are passionate about? Do people see you as credible when you share information?

There are many things you could do to improve your ability to share information in your organization, and some are probably obvious. Following are a few ideas, but you are urged to choose no more than three to apply. Unless you are focused in your self-improvement efforts, it is unlikely you will internalize your intention and turn it into action.

  • Share a greeting. Always say "Hi," "Good morning," or "How ya doin'?" or some such greeting as you pass people in the hallway or aisle. There may be a million things on your mind but don't miss the opportunity to provide recognition. Another way to put this is, never take the chance that people may think you are snubbing them.

  • Tell the truth. It is said that you never have to remember what you told people if you told them the truth. When you start stretching the truth and telling lies, you have to work at remembering what you told to whom. Sharing information with people provides you with an opportunity to gain their trust. Don't blow it.

  • Ask questions. Instead of always stating your point of view or telling people what you know, make it a point to frequently ask questions. "What is going well today?" "What are your thoughts on what came up in our meeting?" "What's our biggest challenge today?" "How are people getting along lately?" Show people that you want sharing information to be a two-way street. Show them that you respect and want their point of view instead of just wanting to sell your own.

  • Use stories, analogies, and pictures. When making a presentation to your team, liven things up by getting your points across through stories, analogies, and pictures. Help people see things as well as hear things. Instead of merely saying, "We need to increase production five hundred units a week," describe a week when those numbers were reached. What was going on then, and what did they do differently? If the new production goal is beyond what they have ever reached, paint a picture in their head about what a successful week would look like. For example:

    By 10 o'clock on Monday, the first bin would be filled and shipped off to the docks. By noon we would have all the second bin components lined up and ready for final assembly after lunch . By Tuesday afternoon we would know if any of our customers returned parts produced on Monday and we would adjust our rotation accordingly . On hump day we would get pizza shipped in for our afternoon break to celebrate that we are ahead of schedule. On Friday, the first round is on me at our favorite pub because we beat the goal that management is challenging us with.

  • Repeat yourself. Here's an old adage for presentations: "Start by telling them what you are going to tell them. Then tell them. Finish by telling them what you told them." Prepare people for the information you are going to share with them. Tell them how many points you need to get across to them. Explain each point. End the talk by reciting the list of the points they need to remember.

  • Separate opinion from fact. Facts are friendly. People are better off knowing what they have to deal with than not knowing. State the facts and where you got them. You might also want to share your point of view of what you think is going on, but make sure it's clear that's what you are doing. You may have insights from interactions that did not involve the person to whom you are now providing information. Let people know what you think may be happening and then ask them what their view is. "Collectively, we might figure things out. Let's do that together."

  • Never bring up more than seven. The human brain tends to organize blocks of information in units no larger than seven. In fact we are lucky to remember lists even that long. If you need to raise more than seven issues, try to categorize them so that the final outline is not longer than seven items. Ideally, don't share more than five things at a time ”use the fingers on one hand to stress each point.

What are you going to do to improve your ability to share information with team members, your boss, or other members of your organization? Football and basketball coaches frequently decide what the team's first plays are going to be even before the game begins. Sometimes circumstances cause the script to be abandoned , but the team goes into the game with the confidence of knowing what they are supposed to do. This is known as scripting the plays. Exercise 15 can help you become more aware of your intentions as you script tomorrow's activities.

Listening Effectively

How good are you at listening? Listening is actually even more important than sharing information as you attempt to communicate with the teams you are helping. Listening is key to understanding, respectful relationship building, problem solving, and learning.

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EXERCISE 15

Scripting the Start of Your Day

Directions: Script the first three or four interactions you hope to have at the beginning of tomorrow's workday . As you walk into your place of work, who are you likely to see and who are you intentionally going to seek out? What information are you going to share with these individuals? How are you going to share this information in a more skillful manner?

You might want to rehearse these interactions on the night before. Highlight points in your mind during your drive to your office, factory, restaurant, or school. Remember, things may not go according to plan, but put your best foot forward instead of winging it. Purposely work on your ability to share information more effectively. Share it in a way that gets information across and builds better relations.

SCENARIO # 1

  • Who will you encounter?

  • What are the main points you want to share with each person?

  • Which of the tips outlined in this section do you want to incorporate to attempt to share information in a more skillful manner?

  • How will you determine if this was successful?

SCENARIO # 2

  • Who will you encounter?

  • What are the main points you want to share with each person?

  • Which tips do you want to incorporate to attempt to share information in a more skillful manner?

  • How will you determine if this was successful?

SCENARIO #3

  • Who will you encounter?

  • What are the main points you want to share with each person?

  • Which tips do you want to incorporate to attempt to share information in a more skillful manner?

  • How will you determine if this was successful?

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Most adults are lousy listeners. As little kids , we naturally hear what is being said, but somehow in the process of growing up we seem to jump to trying to respond rather than to listen. The first thing out of our mouth after someone has shared a thought with us is "I agree," "I disagree ," or "Here's what I think." Or perhaps: "Ah, that's nothing ”you should hear what happened to me." We fail to describe what we have heard before we evaluate it. Our brain can process information so quickly (much faster than anyone can speak), that we already move on to our reactions , our issues, our responses. Showing someone that you actually heard what he or she said is a powerful way to show respect. It turns sequential monologues into potential dialogues . It is a way to connect. What could you be doing to improve your listening skills? You will never be a perfect listener, but that shouldn't stop you from trying to improve. As a leader in a team environment, you will have no more important skill than listening. Let's examine some tips to consider. Pick one or two that you can commit to using today.

  • You must really want to listen! Aren't there some people at work you really don't look forward to listening to? The two of you won't team up successfully until you break through and respectfully listen to each other. Leaders are often tempted to control situations by talking instead of listening, but the power of listening is what creates the bonds on great teams.

  • Pay attention and show attention. If you are looking at your watch or flipping through the pages of a report or newspaper, you are giving signals that you don't really want to listen to the other person. Give respectful eye contact. Look friendly. Encourage the other person to say what they are thinking. Avoid interrupting her before she finishes her thought. The more you show you are listening, the more you will hear.

  • Hear what the person actually says. The adult mind hears a few words and starts to process it. While we're analyzing and interrupting what we're hearing we miss whole sentences, even paragraphs. Listening is a two-phased process: a descriptive phase and an evaluative phase. Don't jump to the evaluative phase too quickly. If you dedicate yourself to being able to describe everything you hear before you put your two cents in, you will become a better listener overnight.

  • Feelings are not right or wrong. Just listen to what the person is feeling. Avoid telling the person, "You should be happy" or, "You shouldn't feel upset about that." You don't have to agree with people's feelings ”just make sure they know that you heard how they do feel.

  • Take the listener's needs into account. Remember who you are listening to and what you know about his personality or situation. If he has a preference for Introversion, be sure you give him some time to collect his thoughts before you expect him to respond. If he is under a lot of pressure, use a calm tone of voice and show some patience. Sometimes it is helpful to report your own feelings. This can create a supportive and open atmosphere. However, beware of the tendency to steal the spotlight.

  • Watch for nonverbal signals. People attempt to tell us a lot by their body language and tone of voice. They may be telling you how strongly they feel about the information they are sharing with you. Take into consideration any contradictions between what they are saying and what they are showing.

  • Clarify the situation. Check things out instead of making assumptions. You might misinterpret the person's body language. A person's foot wiggling fast when a certain topic comes up may indicate he is sensitive about the topic or that he is excited about it, or it may just mean he has to go to the bathroom. The same body signal can mean different things. Clarify what you hear as well. Don't pretend that you understand everything being said. Show that you care to get it right.

What will you do to improve your listening skills? Exercise 16 provides a log to help you to monitor your listening efforts and to chart your progress.

Providing Feedback

Providing feedback completes the two-way loop of effective communication. The team concept will not work without people being able to give each other feedback. At its most basic level, providing feedback is just good descriptive listening. It entails stating that you heard what the person said or noticing what the person actually did. Beyond being a verification process, it may include some judgment and reinforcement. It is an opportunity to praise behaviors or stated intentions you want to see continued or to point out some need for change. Here is another opportunity to be the X-factor in your team's efforts to be excellent . As a leader, you need to model providing feedback in an effective manner. You must have the courage to give constructive feedback. You also need to encourage team members to give their fellow team members feedback.

Following are seven tips for improving your ability to provide feed-back. While they are all important to this crucial skill, remember that improving your ability is enhanced when you focus your efforts. You are urged to choose the one to three tips that you believe are most deserving of your time and energy.

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EXERCISE 16

Monitoring Your Listening

Directions:

Use the log below to collect data from the next three phone calls you place (not receive). For each call, use a stopwatch to measure how much time you spend listening and the total time of the call. Then calculate the percentage of time you spent listening. Identify which listening tips you attempted to practice during the call.

After completing this log, monitor the next three face-to-face interactions you have at work. Instead of using a stopwatch for these, merely record which listening tips you used and what you could have done better as a listener. Look for patterns regarding your listening skills and what impact they are having. Develop an action plan to continue your progress.

PHONE CALL # 1:

  • Who did you call, and what was the purpose of the call?

  • Percentage of time spent listening:

  • Listening tips you found yourself practicing:

  • What could you have done better as a listener in this phone call?

PHONE CALL #2:

  • Who did you call, and what was the purpose of the call?

  • Percentage of time spent listening:

  • Listening tips you found yourself practicing:

  • What could you have done better as a listener in this phone call?

PHONE CALL # 3:

  • Who did you call, and what was the purpose of the call?

  • Percentage of time spent listening:

  • Listening tips you found yourself practicing:

  • What could you have done better as a listener in this phone call?

FACE-TO-FACE INTERACTION # 1:

  • Listening tips you found yourself practicing:

  • What could you have done better as a listener in this interaction?

FACE-TO-FACE INTERACTION # 2:

  • Listening tips you found yourself practicing:

  • What could you have done better as a listener in this interaction?

FACE-TO-FACE INTERACTION #3:

  • Listening tips you found yourself practicing:

  • What could you have done better as a listener in this interaction?

PATTERNS AND IMPACT:

  • What patterns do you see emerging from the data you collected in this log?

  • What impact are these having on your efforts to be a better listener?

  • What is your plan for continuing to improve your listening skills?

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  • Time it well. Try to give feedback as soon as possible after the behavior occurred or the intention was stated. It is important that these things be fresh in the mind of the person to whom you are trying to provide feedback. Since imposed feedback is usually less effective than requested feedback, you need to quickly read the person's reaction and receptivity. Be prepared to suggest a time when it may be more convenient and a location where the two of you can continue the discussion in private. Be empathetic and sensitive to the feelings of the recipient.

  • Describe before you evaluate. State the facts. Describe what you saw or heard. Do not say that you liked or disliked it. Ask the person if she saw it the same way. Unless the two of you agree about the facts of the situation, the likelihood of your coming to the same conclusions is not high. When it comes time to state your judgment of the behavior or statement, be sure to honestly praise the elements you genuinely liked. In fact, you should be trying to positively reinforce behaviors far more often than offering criticism. People who receive praise from you on a regular basis are more likely to accept negative feedback from you on the occasions where it is needed.

  • Be specific rather than general. Provide details. Be clear about the actual behavior you are trying to reinforce or change. Don't be vague by saying things like "I am having trouble with your attitude." Pinpoint the concern (or the positive judgment) by giving examples. "I noticed that you said, 'Yeah, right,' after every point I raised in the meeting we just left. Am I correct in assuming from your tone of voice that you don't believe I will do what I was proposing ?"

  • Disagree with behaviors rather than judge the person. Do not attack, discount, or demean the person to whom you are giving feedback. Deal with behaviors, not personalities. If you are going to criticize someone, make it clear that you disagree with what he said or did, not that you think less of him as a person.

  • Don't critique for the sake of critiquing. Direct your feedback toward things that the receiver can address and things in which you and the team have a stake in the outcome. Does it really matter, or do you just want to vent? Remember that the purpose of providing feedback is either to positively reinforce or negatively "deinforce" behaviors. Your role is not to declare a person guilty of something. Provide feedback so that the person is motivated to repeat, or use more frequently, the positive behaviors you noticed. Or provide feedback on behaviors that are creating problems and that the person can change if she is willing. There must be options. Give the receiver the first opportunity to identify the options that might produce a different result. Add options for her to consider but make sure you are helping her help herself. (Additional information on this form of coaching is provided in chapter 8.)

  • Summarize agreements. If the feedback leads to agreement, summarize who will do what with whom by when. Offer any assistance you are willing to provide to make the change successful. Be sure that both of you know what to monitor to verify that the feedback was put to use. If the only agreement the two of you can reach is to talk about it some more, make sure you set up a time to get back together.

  • Receive as well as give feedback. Ask for feedback on how your effort to provide feedback went. Ask what you did that helped and what you did that could have been handled better. Here is your chance to model a nondefensive approach to feedback. Make the giving and receiving of feedback be seen as a learning opportunity.

Your teams need effective communication, and you need to be a leader in attempting to set the standard of continually improving everyone's ability to communicate. Interpersonal communication really breaks down to the three basic skills described earlier: sharing information, listening effectively, and providing constructive feedback. What has experience taught you regarding your ability to demonstrate these skills? Experience can be a great teacher if you pay attention to it.

Exercise 17 is designed to guide you through the process of reflecting on what lessons you have learned from your efforts to communicate with a team. While you can complete this exercise individually, it is even more powerful if you complete it with another team leader. This will create the opportunity to practice sharing information, listening effectively, and providing constructive feedback. It can also provide you with the opportunity to learn vicariously through the experiences of another team leader.

Thus far, we have focused on your ability to communicate. What can you do to help team members communicate more effectively with each other? You could arrange a communication skills training session for the team and hand members copies of tips for improving listening and feedback skills. We all form communication habits. Helping team members become aware of their communication strengths and weaknesses is an important first step. You could share the tips provided in this chapter and ask each member to apply one to three tips for each skill just as you are doing. Help team members identify their own set of expectations for communicating with each other. They may be more committed to live by self-selected rules than by rules imposed on them. You may wish to dedicate a whole team meeting to the topic.




Tools for Team Leadership. Delivering the X-Factor in Team eXcellence
Tools for Team Leadership: Delivering the X-Factor in Team eXcellence
ISBN: 0891063862
EAN: 2147483647
Year: 2003
Pages: 137

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