HOW TO MANAGE YOUR OWN SELF CARE


You are a whole person! In an ideal world with ideal people, the whole person should have a repertoire and set of recipes for creating a wonderful life, at home and at work. Everyone else on the rest of the planet must strive for such balance on a daily basis. Healthy people have a plan and a process to care for their physical, emotional, mental and spiritual well-being. This book would be remiss if it avoided the whole person in favor of one of these four foundations of well-being. Take ample time to review your foundations for health as you define them. Favoring one of the four cornerstones while ignoring the others leads to operating in an unbalanced state. Doing a daily practice, discipline, or treatment of some kind in each category will keep you balanced no matter what comes your way. You need to be balanced when standing in the presence of change. Balance does not mean fixed ” it can mean staying in one position for a long time, or being alert and ready to spring into action. All athletes have ways to strengthen their balance because they know how important it is to motion. Are your foundations balanced or do you put all your energies into one category at the expense of the other three?

Create your own self-care practice. First, fill in the chart provided with what you do now in each category. Then, with a colored pen or pencil, collage, or other creative form, add what you would like to change or add to your self-care regimen in the next weeks, months and years . Use the examples provided to being thinking about your self care.

  • PHYSICAL: Exercise, diet, grooming and hygiene, movement, temperature, senses (vision, taste, touch, hearing, smelling) observing art, dancing , wearing different colors and textures, hugs or handshakes, good hand washing, breathing deeply in the morning air, music, trying different foods , a day of silence.

  • SPIRITUAL: Exploring the relationship you have with whatever or whoever it is you think is in charge of the universe. Making that relationship a priority. Find a spiritual or religious practice that is yours.

  • MENTAL: Challenging yourself in areas of non-expertise, in other words, if you read all the time. take a break. If you never read, pick up a book. If you read nonfiction, take a break with a cheesy novel , and if all you ever read is cheese, pick up a biography. It is okay if you take four years to read a book. It is the willingness that is important. Go to an opera, or stay at home and play a board game. Do crossword puzzles, or start a non-profit organization and build a board of directors. Do more, or do less, but do it awake.

  • EMOTIONAL: Your feelings matter mostly to you, but they do matter. You are human because you have discernment and feel differently about different things. At the end of life people generally do not regret having had a full life with emotions. If they regret , it is that they missed feeling something because they were not paying attention in the moment.

Personal Toolkit

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How to Enhance Your Emotional Value as a Manager

  • Avoid critical behaviors

  • Remember to express your highest ideals

  • Humor is appropriate when it is appropriate

  • Remember the big picture of the mission

  • All critical incidents are temporary so take the extra moments to make certain you are responding at your highest level

  • Feelings and emotions are good, yours and theirs

  • Respect is not just a song by Aretha Franklin

  • Become approachable

  • Do not interrupt to interject you opinion

  • Relax

  • Sarcasm is never useful

  • Posture sets a tone

  • Pleasantness is possible even during conflict

  • Detach from the people to see the issue or problem

  • Assume people are telling the truth first

  • Become comfortable with your strengths

  • Become comfortable with your weaknesses

  • Give people an opportunity to maintain their dignity , even when they are wrong

  • Solicit other opinions

  • Seek to understand others

  • Be an advocate for reconciliation

  • Take breaks

  • 'Please' and 'thank you' are classics

  • Know the difference between formal and informal meetings

  • Only take notes when necessary

  • Express your feelings and opinions clearly and simply when possible

  • Optimism is stronger than pessimism

  • Appropriate praise does not make you lose power

  • Courtesy and kindness can work at the jobsite

  • Listen with attention

  • Speak with a pleasant tone

  • Pay attention to what your face is doing: grimace , rolling eyes, smiling

  • Do not fear losing all personal power with an apology, it builds bridges

  • Do not use an apology to take power, or the bridge will collapse

  • Remember people are generally good

  • Remember bad people do exist

  • Try different ways to interact with different people

  • Ask appropriate questions

  • Confront issues and not people

  • Do not avoid discussing personal issues that may impact your employees : death of a loved one, pet, divorce, birthday, wedding , graduation

How to Manage a Self-Evaluation

After filling out this questionnaire, determine the areas you want to change or keep the same. What would help you be your best?

Am I consistent?

Yes

No

Do my words match my actions?

Yes

No

Do my gestures match my words?

Yes

No

Am I condescending or sarcastic ?

Yes

No

Do people trust me?

Yes

No

Do I trust myself ?

Yes

No

Do I anticipate others' concerns?

Yes

No

Am I curious ?

Yes

No

Am I flexible?

Yes

No

Am I on task?

Yes

No

Am I on task emotionally?

Yes

No

Do I think results are more important than people?

Yes

No

Am I comfortable with my own emotions?

Yes

No

Am I comfortable with the emotions of others?

Yes

No

Am I open to learn from everyone?

Yes

No

Do I maintain my commitments and follow through?

Yes

No

Do I make excuses and blame others?

Yes

No

Do I value and work well with differences?

Yes

No

Am I having any fun?

Yes

No

Do I avoid conflict?

Yes

No

Do I foster conflict?

Yes

No

Do I enjoy leadership?

Yes

No

Are my communications purposeful?

Yes

No

Are my interactions calm?

Yes

No

Are my interactions chaotic ?

Yes

No

Do I manage problem solving without taking it personally ?

Yes

No

Do I have good support?

Yes

No

Do I have good resources?

Yes

No

Do I share credit with others?

Yes

No

Do I approach or withdraw from problem solving?

Yes

No

Do I have neutrality skills?

Yes

No

Do I motivate others?

Yes

No

Do I serve as an example of top ideals and ethical standards?

Yes

No

Do I reward?

Yes

No

Do I punish?

Yes

No

Do I back up my people?

Yes

No

Do I encourage others to grow?

Yes

No

Do I create obstacles?

Yes

No

Am I an obstacle ?

Yes

No

Do I ask others to do what I will not do myself?

Yes

No

Do I laugh ?

Yes

No

Do I relax?

Yes

No

Do I rise to the occasion?

Yes

No

Am I where I want to be?

Yes

No

Am I growing and learning on a daily basis?

Yes

No

Do I make realistic promises?

Yes

No

Do I protect confidentiality or sensitive data?

Yes

No

Am I honest?

Yes

No

Can I admit error?

Yes

No

Can I admit error graciously?

Yes

No

DO I FOLLOW A CODE OF ETHICS?

YES

NO




Emotional Terrors in the Workplace. Protecting Your Business' Bottom Line. Emotional Continuity Management in the Workplace
Emotional Terrors in the Workplace: Protecting Your Business Bottom Line - Emotional Continuity Management in the Workplace
ISBN: B0019KYUXS
EAN: N/A
Year: 2003
Pages: 228

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